Teen "Love"

I've been reading through some of my friend's news feeds on Facebook (don't make fun, we all have a Facebook) and I keep stumbling upon teenage girls and relationships. There's nothing wrong with relationships, we all go through them, and truth is that we all need them. They help us grow, help us get more experience from life and teach us to become stronger when the times call for it. But in my own opinion, these teenagers don't know what love is. They throw it around like it was nothing more than a used condom. What I don't understand is how can you break up with someone you "loved," and 2 days later, get with someone else and brag 2 hours later that you "love" them? It don't make a bit of sense to me. Yes, I been through a breakup and she told me "what we had wasn't true." Now, I know she's lying through her teeth just to force herself to move on, and, case and point, she "loves" this guy after 2 hours of their first meeting because he held a door open for her. I flat out told her she hasn't a clue what love is and she got defensive, probably because she knew I was right. I just don't understand girls. I was in pain for 8 months over my ex and she was already on her second guy after me. Thanks for making me feel like I wasn't ever shit to you, even though you know in your heart that we were each other's everything. But fuck it, the past is gone and I'm working on something with someone much better. Instead of hating you, I should be thanking you for helping me find someone better. Anyhow, back to the subject at hand. Girls never take time to heal, they just fucking jump right into new relationships. It helps ease the pain of a recent breakup, like how Morphine helps kill the pain of those pulled teeth. They jump into the "I love you's" after days or weeks into dating and they rush things. They rush and rush just to extinguish that old flame and kill the pain, but what they don't realize is that they're only setting themselves up for the ultimate failure. When you rush this fast, you're blind to what you truly feel. You're only trying to get over that person that broke your heart, fucked you over and you don't stop to realize that. Sure, I can see it lasting for a while, Hell, even a few years, but I believe that down the road you'll discover what you overlooked and what you were blind too and then figure out that you don't really "love" this person. To my ex, I hope karma fucking destroys you. I hope he makes you so happy and then breaks it off with you and you feel the pain that I felt for 8 long months. "I told you, you'd be sorry if I fucking left, I'd laugh while you wept! How's it feel now? Yeah, funny ain't it, you neglected me! Did me a favor although my spirit free you've said, but a special place for you in my heart I have kept. It's unfortunate..."

*I'll update this post more as I think of stuff. I had so much last night, but I forgot most of it. Alcohol does that...

Why The Warning When Entering Your Blog?!

So you might be asking yourself (or not) what's up with the Google warning sign? Are you publishing porn? While I would love to write and direct a porno film, the reason the warning is up us because of my use of foul language. Yes, I came from Pittsburgh so I used "fuck" a lot. More importantly, my angry rants will contain much more profanity and "mature material" so yeah. I don't want to pollute the minds of today's youth so I put up that fucking warning sign. Someday if I get enough people to back it up, I might start a hardcore porno Blog, but I doubt anyone would want to see that.

Zombie Survival Guide

Are you prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse of December 2012?

If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I'm paranoid. Paranoid that on December 21, 2012 the world will NOT be destroyed by an Earthquake, War or some other natural disaster, but rather be overrun with Zombies! By December 21, 2012, Hell will be so full that it won't possibly be able to fit another soul into it's dark abyss, so when Hell is full, the Dead will walk the Earth! Personally, I myself am prepared. I sleep with a Colt M1911 under my pillow, a Benelli M4 shotgun is hanging on the wall above the top of my bed, various weapons fill a small aluminum shed and in the big wooden shed next to it, an (almost) unlimited amount of ammunition. To help increase your chances of survival, I will share my knowledge of Zombie Survival that I picked up from every Romero Zombie film and the Left 4 Dead Series.

(Standard Zombie Emergency Kit)

Let's cover the basics...

How To Identify A Zombie:

1. Disheveled appearance (ex: rotting flesh, smells like shit)
2. Unresponsive to communication (ex: shouting "hey" 3 times and getting "uhhhh" as a response)
3. Pale, often clammy, decomposing flesh
4. No concept of personal boundaries
5. Motivation to eat the brains of the Living

How To Kill A Zombie:
Killing a Zombie is quite simple! The Zombie functions with the brain. So all you gotta do is take the brain out! A well placed bullet between the eyes is the quickest and easiest way, but I conserve ammunition by using a blunt object (such as a crowbar or sledgehammer) and using blunt force on head of the Zombie. While this way saves ammunition, it also can be dangerous as it will tire you out quicker and more than 1 hit may be needed. Choose your methods wisely!

Guns:
It doesn't really matter what gun you use as (almost) all guns use bullets. Bullet to a Zombie's head equals good! However, a Flamethrower is a bad idea. The flames would take a long amount of time to cook and destroy the brain so bullets are the preferred method. Explosives such as grenades or an RPG can be used so long as the head/brain of the Zombie is destroyed.

Melee Weapons:
Almost any weapon can be used for a melee attack so long as they are heavy enough or sharp enough to either bash the skull in and break it or slice through the skull and cut up the brain. Contrary to popular belief, a Chainsaw, while effective, is not the best choice for a melee weapon. Think about it...carrying around that red canister of gasoline would slow your ass down! Then when that gasoline is out, you gonna carry a Chainsaw on your back and fill it up at the nearest gas station? I'm not saying a Chainsaw is a loss, it's just has some serious cons. Think before using it!

Golden Rules:

1. The minute someone in your group is bitten, execute them with a bullet to the head to save time. They're already dead, so fuck it, send them to Hell now.
2. Always stick in a group! It's a lot harder to fight the horde with only one machine gun. Stick close and help one another out!
3. Zombies are evolving too, so never underestimate them! They may be brain dead, but they're getting smarter than Hell!
4. Conserve as much ammunition as possible! It sucks when the horde is coming for your sorry ass and your guns are all empty.
5. Keep an escape plan and Emergency Zombie Survival Kit in your home. Don't wait...do the shit now!

Well, that's all I got. If you want to contribute to this Zombie Survival Guide, leave a comment and I will incorporate it into future updates. And remember...December 21, 2012: If you wanna stay alive, stay together! The Human Race will triumph and send those Undead Bastards back to Hell where they came from!

Guess Who's Back?!

(This is what I do in my spare time...staring contest with cats)

Wow, I've been absent from this Blog for almost 3 months! After forgetting my password and resetting the passwords of every one of my 5 Email accounts and now realizing I'm going to forget every single fucking password, I finally logged in! I'm going to start posting tons more shit on here because I just feel creative. Some shit may be sad, happy, offensive, whatever I feel like, I'll post it. Heed that as a warning now and realize now that limits will be pushed and rules will be broken. That's pretty much all I gotta say right now. Fuck, I don't even know how to end this so I'll just end it with this sentence with an ellipsis and make it look dramatic, just because I can...